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Fear

I’m scared of many things and sometimes it can get to me. In school, I’m the loud introvert if that makes any sense. This just means there may be few details that are hidden. To be honest, I actually don’t care if people know my fears or not, as long as they don’t use it against me.

Fearing something can be quite strong as it can lead to certain phobias. And phobias are hard to overcome, however, over time it can gradually fade.

The point is that fears shouldn’t be used as a weapon, otherwise it can lead people to fall. Since I trust you guys so much I’ll tell you my ‘dislikes’:

  • Lightning/thunder
  • Insects
  • Being Alone
  • Marriage/Love
  • Clowns
  • Being touched

Please comment you fears if you want.

-Oreo (Sorry that I haven’t been active, I’m near the end of My GCSE’S (exams))

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The Assassin’s Heart

You cannot run,

You cannot hide

I will find you,

Dead or alive

This is my occupation,

I feel obliged

You’re are my next target,

Consider it done

 

Your blood in my hands,

It is my pleasure

You are my entertainment,

You are my fun

Though once it is all over,

I will move on

On to the next one,

The one you are not

 

The way that I feel,

Consumes me whole

I then heal,

and created a hole

‘What is inside of me?’

I do not reveal,

But when we are alone,

Then you will know

 

You will know the emptiness

A human without a soul

Cannot feel guilty

Cannot feel remorse,

And that is the Assassin’s heart,

Or that is what they say

Passion

Throughout my whole life, I wanted to be so many things. I wanted to be so many things. I wanted to be a veterinarian, a social worker, a lawyer and a musician. However, there was and still that one thing I’m always lacking and that my friend is passion.
I’ve never had any passion and I sometimes wonder what it’s like having a clear path ahead. My mother has a passion for art, whilst my step dad has a passion for music. When I watch them enjoying what they’re doing, I can’t help but envy them.
When I’m in school I wonder what I’m working towards, what is my goal in life. In the end, I can’t think of anything and this always gets me scared.
Scared of growing up because I’m scared of what’s to come.
How do we humans move on without any passion? Watching everyone that is always step ahead makes me feel lost like time is moving without me. I guess I’m going to have to wait for the future to pass me by and find out who I am!

The Gate

I had taken a walk into the woods by my house. You see my parents were making too much noise by arguing. It was undoubtedly irritating, though I guess that is how people around me are; irritating. The woods were big and by big, I mean huge that I had eventually gotten myself lost. I know pathetic, but I didn’t know anywhere else where I could find some peace of mind.

As I strolled through the tower like trees; I had suddenly heard an unknown voice. It was faint but loud enough that I could tell it was humane. I wanted to ignore it, just in case, it was someone deceptive. Unfortunately, that particular voice was a magnet to me; making me subconsciously follow it.

As I walked, gravel upon gravel, I had found a pathway that I thought may lead me to an exit out of these smirking trees that baffled me with every gravel I walked upon on. Being the inquisitive person I am, I decided to keep following, hoping that it may lead me out of these sinister woods. As I placed my foot on the pathway, the clouds had gradually turned grey. As I took another step, it suddenly rained. Every step I took the atmosphere became more and more distressing. That was until I reached the gate; the gate which leads to an unknown world. A world that is different to ours. As I walked through the large brick walls, the lights of the lamppost upon began to flicker; the rain stopped and became a gust of wind.

And I became a prisoner.

Things I do when I’m bored in school

  1. Harass my friends on social media
  2. Check my Instagram feed
  3. Shout out random shit
  4. Eat food
  5. Listen to music
  6. Sing very loudly
  7. Dance randomly
  8. Try to annoy my friends to get a reaction
  9. day dream
  10. Poke people
  11. Insult anyone who crosses my path
  12. Eat again
  13. Ask a lot of random questions
  14. Do a lot of stupid things
  15. Tell everyone ‘I’M BORED’
  16. Then shout to the school ‘I’M BORED’
  17. The cycle repeats

Hatred

Hatred! The one thing that is stuck to my heart; the distaste when I see that particular person in front of me makes my skin crawl. The person who makes me give out fake smiles, while my mind is swearing at them; the person that I now want to get rid of for taking my property. However, in the end, I can’t do anything about it. My heart says yes but my brain says no.

The two always contradicting making me indecisive. What do I do? How can I control myself, when my fingers twitch to have them around his neck? I just want it done and over with, though I know I can’t. There’s only one factor in my way… He’s already dead.

Friends

I’m not one to make a big deal about breaking up with my friends, to be honest, it was usually me breaking them, but only for good reasons. Ever since I could remember, I used to choose my friends, probably because of my trust issues, but because I didn’t like a lot of people as I used to see the worst in them. I was civil with everyone. However, I was also cynical.

Over a year ago, I moved schools from London to a smaller city, where I made lots of great friends. I somehow started talking to everyone and opened up my shell, though I still tend to ignore a lot of people, who I find ‘unimportant’. It’s not that I’m a snob or anything, for god’s sake, I’m an EastEnder. It’s just that I like to make friends with people, where I can avoid the whole drama. Yes, to make friends I need to open up. However, it’s good to play it safe, so you don’t trust the wrong people.

Now things that make a good friend to me:

  • Shares food
  • Can take your jokes (similar humour)
  • Loyal
  • Lends and pays back money
  • Helps with Homework
  • Gives a great reaction, when teased
  • Supports and backs you up
  • Anyone who agrees to do the crazy things that you cannot do alone
  • Lastly, someone who makes you feel comfortable to be around

Obviously, this can’t be one side!

Hope you make the right friends in life, but don’t worry about making mistakes, just go with the flow to build strong ties. And if you agree, then please like it and if you don’t then comment your opinion.

-Oreo